The Office Characters As A Digital Marketing Team

SEO Twitter seems to be pretty heated lately. Don’t get me wrong, there are some amazing people on there sharing incredible resources and building people up. The SERPs look crazy, people are losing their minds over E-E-A-T, GA4 stinks, our pet’s heads are falling off.

I figured I should take some time to write something important that can really help the industry. The Office Characters As A Digital Marketing Team (I wish I could have done Sunny, but the people voted – If you want to write on another show, send it my way).

IMPORTANT ‼️

Research for new article

Which show do digital marketers watch/like more?

— Mike Ginley (@mikeginleyseo) February 5, 2024

I mean these comparisons in the nicest way!

Michael Scott – VP of Digital Marketing

This is an easy one, he has to be an exec. But also he reminds me too much of Digital Marketing execs. He may have once been in the trenches doing PPC or SEO when it was DMOZ and Google+, but is now so far removed that he honestly has no idea what’s going on day-to-day. He likes to dress nice, be the star of the show during meetings, and can sell highlights to the higher-ups. Buzzwords for days!

His digital marketing strategy is not based on reality but sometimes accidentally hits like the Golden Ticket idea. He just tells his team to create content that goes viral. When he is presenting he speaks with so much confidence, but the SMEs know he has no idea what he is talking about.

His team usually works best when he isn’t involved. They are usually cruising, but he comes in with some new fresh idea and derails everything.

Even though Michael is a bit wacky and the typical VP of Digital whose ideas and strategies change like the weather, he remembers how important the human element is. So many digital marketers get stuck in data and algorithms and forget about optimizing for the user. This is where Michael’s real talent comes into play not just with customers but also with his team. Unless he promises raises to everyone and has to walk that back and instead offer them a pizza party.

Dwight Schrute – Analytics (Assistant to the Digital Marketing VP)

You can’t argue with analytics and you can’t argue with Dwight!

He is convinced since he owns all the data and that he is the most important person in the company. He doesn’t give access to the analytics tools because he is crazy concerned about security and the integrity of the data.

Also, he is convinced he is the #2 at the company regardless of where he sits in the org chart.

He once hired a hacker and gave him access to cpanel for their company’s website to test how the team would react to their site being taken hostage. It gave Stanley a heart attack cause he didn’t know about the hack and all PPC ads were disapproved for weeks.

Ryan Howard – Lead Developer

ChatGPT, Headless, SPA, Python, VR, Programmatic SEO, WUPHF.

Every new technology that comes out, this guy knows about it and has some crazy opinion. To make it even better the dude works in a small closet with neon lights. The Office was ahead of its time with all these streamers with neon computer setups.

“I’M SUCH A PERFECTIONIST THAT I’D KINDA RATHER NOT DO IT AT ALL THAN DO A CRAPPY VERSION.” – Ryan Howard

This quote says it all! MVP does not exist with the lead developer, it needs to be perfect and perfect is his way or no way.

Andy Bernard – Content Writer

The Narddog (how he signs off on emails)!

This is definitely what he has for his author byline. And let’s be real, he’s a big fan of E-E-A-T. He gets to talk about Cornell, ever heard of it?

I am pretty sure every content writer I have ever worked with has also played an instrument of some kind and it’s typically something unique like a banjo. Also, have you ever tried to correct a writer or tell them how to word something? They usually get pretty angry.

He is constantly trying to come up with interesting ways to re-word technical content that goes against the content template.

Creed Bratton – Tech SEO Specialist

Not 100% sure what they do and you’re afraid to ask. He just sits in his corner and worries about JS onclick links, log file analysis and always thinks Google is out to get him. He is convinced John Mueller is a Twitter plant to distract SEOs from some crazy algorithm updates and Google’s other sneaky activities.

He responds to every Google SearchLiaison tweet correcting them with some sort of old Google documentation.

Honorable Mentions

Kevin Malone – Social Media Specialist

Honestly, this is only because he would tweet something inappropriate from the main account that he meant for his personal. He may also accidentally make something go viral every now and then which helps him keep his job.

Kelly Kapoor – Influencer Marketing

Spends all her day DM’ing celebrities and calling it work. She gets Travis Kelce to respond cause he’s in every commercial now. She uses this to her advantage to try and become best friends with Taylor Swift, but also shows the DM’s to Ryan to make it look like shes flirting with Travis. Ultimately she forgets to even send Travis any of the promotional material.

Pam Beesly – Creative Director

Pam while extremely talented with design always is looking for more responsibility and credit. Even with her talent, she is always doubting the quality of her work.

The creative directors are typically quiet, but lethal in the team group chats. Pam constantly is roasting Michael’s strategies and creating memes based on Dwight and Michael.

Angela Martin – Email Marketing / CRM Manager

You do not want to go against her processes.

When the email campaign doesn’t perform, she blames Content, Creative and Analytics. “I don’t want to blame anyone in particular. I think everyone’s to blame.”

Stanley Hudson – PPC Manager

Just leave him alone and let him do his thing.

He likes his puzzles and what is more of a puzzle than Quality Scores and Search Impression Shares?

Like Stanley not knowing anything changing in the office around him, he has no idea nor does he care about what is going on with SEO, Social or even website updates. And like his love for free pretzels, he loves free swag at conferences which I am convinced there is more PPC swag than SEO.

Toby Flenderson – Legal / Compliance

Even though he is extremely nice, everyone hates dealing with him. He is a necessary part of the team but every time you see him you scream ‘No! Nooooooooo!!!!!!’

He’s constantly getting in arguments when Andy tries to make the Cookie Compliance content more casual. ‘Hey Big Tuna’s, Our website uses cookies, or biscuits as they would say across the pond to deliver our services. Agree to these terms bromigo!’ Ultimately everyone just ignores him and publishes what they want leaving him to deal with the fallout.